Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Complexity and Smelling Smoke

Do you know what this is? If you guessed a fly's eyes, you are incorrect. These are the eyes of a Daddy Long Legs spider. When I look at this picture, I wonder how is it that people do not believe in a god. If a head of a Daddy Long Legs looks like this close up, just think how complex my OCD would look if you could actually observe it under a microscope. And if my OCD was tangible, how many dimensions would it be? It makes my brain hurt just to think about it.

That's why I don't want to know every little thing about my OCD. I am happy just to know the important stuff like: what triggers it and how do I cope with it? I really don't care why I have it and how it got here because it is going to be here no matter what. I am constantly accused of over analyzing things in my life, even analyzing episodes of the Everybody Loves Raymond TV show. I am always saying, "That doesn't make sense." But somehow the one thing that makes sense in my life is my OCD. For me, I believe it evolved into a coping mechanism growing up. I worried about things that most normal kids would never worry about. I see my youngest daughter dwelling on and worrying about the same things and it worries me.

By the way, do any of you smell smoke when it's not there?

Two years ago this Thanksgiving I spent much of Thanksgiving alone, away from my family. I am so glad I don't have to go through that againg. I hope that all of my readers are able to spend time with family and friends this week. If not, please pick up the phone and call someone special.



  1. Hi! Thanks for dropping by my blog. Nice to 'meet' you, Beth!


  2. I think it's wonderful that you can just accept your OCD as is! I know I over-analyze it all the time, turning it over again and again in my mind and making things more complicated and difficult than necessary. Definitely something I should probably work on!